Time Stood Still
Another night spent begging to die,
Walking in the rain as i start to cry,
You tell me to stop, your advice is in vain,
Everythings gone all i'm left with is pain,
But I always tell you i'm ok,
Whilst wishing this stinging would just go away,
I HATE attension, i just want out,
I can't talk to anyone, no-ones about,
I can't forgot all the things you did,
Now for your happiness the marks are hid,
I decided to chose Death instead of the pain,
slicing and dicing, the blood how it will stain,
I'm always hoping it'll end, believing it will,
but now i must be leaving, Time has stood still.
Tears Of Blood
Why can't anyone understand or see,
These rolercoaster emotions consuming me?
I only wish that i could....
But why am I crying Tears Of Blood?
Red streaks flow down,Sat alone crying,
This need for life that stops me from dying,
If only the pain went, if only it would,
Then Maybe i wouldn't cry Tears Of Blood,
Lips with Unspoken words, eyes full of sorrow,
Heart that wonders if it'll beat tomorrow,
Things I could have said, things i should,
But nothing will stop these Tears Of Blood,
Lips will never kiss, eyes look their last,
Arms will never embrace.... memories of the past,
Always lonely, so misunderstood,
Thats why I cry these Tears Of Blood.
Hide The Scars--------------------
Covering with long sleeves, hiding my wrists,
Trying to pretend these marks don't exsist,
Gritting my teeth from the pain i bare,
Wishing a solution would just appear there.
My friends say to stop, i will, i will,
but i just can't... another spill.
I try to be happy, and maybe smile too,
but it always seems to impossible to do...
People say motivation is the key,
But Nothing seems to make a difference to me.
Dreams don't come true, no use to hope,
This fucked up life is to hard to cope.
Pain consumes me, I feel this need,
to rip open the scabs and let them bleed,
the self control i've never met,
can't give me strength only regret.
I try to stop "think of your health"
but why am i trying to kid myself?
I just want my life taken away,
Let this blade still wander astray,
Open these wounds that have been mended,
for long ago my life had ended.
Drip Drop down fall the tears,
The silent flow from all the years,
Hidden deep inside my soul,. unfold
pours out now the pain untold,
Drip drop down falls the tears,
The ray of hope dashed by fears,
an echoing of pityful weeping,
Where inside the soul is screeching,
Drip, drop down falls the Tears,
streaming down from years of sneers,
My heart is broken yet it's pounding,
My mind is clear but my eyes are clouding,
Drip, drop down falls the Blood
i would be you if i could,
Now this pain in silence is all i hear,
my eyes now close, down fals one more tear...
I should never have be born...
heal the wounds bruised and torn,
Hide the pain behind a fake smile,
slit them again mile after mile...
Running down in crimson tears,
Answer to the pain and fears,
Peircing, tearing, ripping apart,
Memories of my broken heart,
The blood washes the pain away,
Slowly bleeding the tortured day,
There scars are reminders of everything
The knife 'slips' again, familiar sting,
These scars are reminders of everything,
Feeling lost, i no longer belong,
These scars are reminders of what went wrong,
Eyes are blurring,blinded by tears,
These scars are the reminder of a;ll the years,
Tortured by memories of that are fading fast
These scars are the memories of the past,
I lie, i hide, shamed with regret,
These scars are reminders of when we met,
I sigh with reminders, as i cry,
These scars are fresh... they bleed goodbye.
Screeching claws, ripping me apart,
Slicing my wrist, slicing my heart,
I scream, begging for it to end,
Blood runs down no time to defend.
I run to the mirror, stalked by my enemy,
I see her face there, my enemy ...is me.
My real life nightmare
Screams echo endlessly in my mind,
Searching for answers i'll never find,
I can't block out this pain i'm feeling,
can't block out these thoughts i'm seeing,
I'm alone, all night long, dreaming,
I see your face... i wake up sacreaming,
Same nightmare that i long for... need,
In my sleeps my scars start to bleed,
Plagued with your past, hate, lies,
My heads confused, i choke on sighs,
The crimson spreads, the woulds won't heal,
This pain is the only thing that feels real,
Scabs ripped open, cuts spreda wide,
Marks and blood i cannot hide,
I try to fight it but i fail,
My blood goes black, my skin goes pale,
Left alone, dying in there,
Trapped in my real life nightmare.
How can you see my suffering, when i don't show my pain?
I cut these marks on my body to tell words i can't explain,
I lie in wait, crying, with cuts i know will stain,
I walk outside but hide my tears in the pouring rain,
Head swirls with confusion, like i'm going insane,
Telling people of my problems but their help i don't hope to gain,
Theres voices in my head, I'm trapped in my brain,
My depression is too great, and it takes over again.
Veins so plushing with red life,
Now sliced open, it runs down the knife,
The crimson pleasure stings and burns,
and bleeds away all my concerns,
Cut down to the bone, rip out each vein,
And bleed away all of my pain,
Tear out my heart, tear out my fears,
Wash away these useless tears,
No longer needed, tese veins suffocate,
Binding me to life and hate,
One last slice, the veins now dead,
Only sign they exists is the blood i've bled.
i decided to fight my depression,
get rid of this sense of opression,
taking this knife from where it lay,
to cut this sense of depression away.
I decided fight my depression,
get rid of unwanted aggression,
filling a bath with unwanted tears,
dive in and drown these depressive years.
I decided this depression must die,
i'm tired of living this lie,
taking this loaded gun to my head,
i'll shot this depression until it's dead.
I'm depressed but fighting this war,
it's really the worst kind of flaw,
but by taking these pills, one by one,
close my eyes and the depression is gone.
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